Web Lecture 5- Liking pinciple

I took an upper GE class last semester where my professor stressed the importance of coming to class. Everyday he took roll and the professor basically learned everyones name in two days and which part of the room they sat at.

The funny thing about attendance was that he would make a scene to the students who never attended class. He would make comments like “wow you finally made it” or “let me take a picture of you so the class can know what you look like”.

Overall, the professor would always tell us that this is an easy upper GE class, just attend class and do your work. He would also emphasize how he was a good guy and we’ll always have fun in this class and watch movies related to the class material. Overall, he would use the liking principle to engender compliance.

In my opinion, regardless of the liking principle some students just wouldn't attend class.

Chapter 15- Gendered Closeness Perspective

The book describes how women express closeness and affection to their children by direct verbal statements and nonverbal expressions such as hugging and kissing. On the other hand, men communicate their affection by sharing activities.

I have to agree with this because I see this from my older brother and sister-in-law when they are around their son. My sister-in-law always gives him kisses and she will always express her love for her son. My brother basically does all the activities with his son. They always go to the golf range, movie theaters, and baseball games specifically the Giants games.

Overall, when I came across this concept I knew it definitely relates to my brother and sister-in-law and how they express their closeness.

Chapter 13- Confront or Avoid

The book mentions how the first choice people make during conflict is whether to confront or avoid the other person. The example used in the book is about a car that might not have been aware that the light turned green.

In this situation, I wouldn’t honk at the other driver. I would probably just wait patiently and avoid conflict. If for some reason I see the driver on their cell phone then I would honk at the driver because then I can assume that they are more concerned about the phone call rather than what is happening on the road.

Also, If I was not in a good mood that day then I would honk because my patients level would probably be at a low point. Overall, I think people would handle this situation in my different ways, but my first choice is not to honk, unless that person takes longer than 5 seconds to realize the light changed.

Chapter 12- Rebuff Hypothesis

In the book, rebuff hypothesis states that "when an initial message is rebuffed, follow-up persuasive messages are ruder, more aggressive, and more forceful than the first one". This can relate to my brother-in-law's neighbor who likes to complain about loud music. There was one night she used the "ask" tactic. She would ring the doorbell and ask if he could turn down the music, but the weird thing is that she would be complaining at 8 o'clock at night. It would be understandable if it was like 10 or 11 at night, but 8 o'clock is still pretty early.

My brother-in-law just ignored her request since it was still early in the evening. The neighbor's next tactic was more ruder and forceful. She kept hearing the loud music, so she walked over to my brother-in-law's house again and rang the doorbell like 10 times, like a crazy woman would and she said she was going to call the police and file and noise compliant if it wouldn't stop.

Overall, I have to agree with the rebuff hypothesis because she went from the "ask" tactic to more ruder tactics.

Web Lecture 4- Four Dialectics

I enjoyed reading about the four dialectics: presence-absence, certainty-uncertainty, openness-closedness, and past-present in regard to the study done on women whose husbands suffered from Alzheimer’s disease.

The concepts reminded me of the movie The Notebook. In presence-absence Allie the main character(who has Alzheimer's disease) is physically present, but as the web lecture states she is also mentally and emotionally not there. To help ease this situation, in the movie Noah tries very hard to bring the memory back to Allie by retelling stories about their dates, first kiss, holding hands, and arguments.

The openness-closedness could be when Noah continues retelling stories, but at one point Allie got really terrified and totally flipped out when Noah was holding her hand. Allie’s respond was a big surprise which can relate to openness-closedness.

Chapter 11- Tactics Used In Disengagement

My good friend once told me a story about someone she met at work. This story is significant because he used withdrawal/avoidance tactics. They met at work and then they started hanging out on a few nights. As things were going good between them, things suddenly changed. He stopped calling her, he did not return any of her calls, and contact at work was very brief. In the end, she found out the he started things back up again with his ex girlfriend, so my friend totally just forgot about the guy.

Overall, I think the guy should of been honest to my friend instead of ignoring her and especially since they worked together they were bound to cross paths.

Chapter 10- Sharing Tasks

The fifth maintenance strategy the book talks about is sharing tasks on page 295. Sharing tasks is defined as performing one's share of the work in the relationship. I see this all the time with my older sister and her husband. The book uses the example one person cooks dinner and the other cleans up. Whenever I am at my sister's place, I know what role goes to who. If my sister cooks the dinner then her husband does the dishes. If her husband cooks then she has to do the dishes. Sometimes my sister usually gets off easy now since she is pregnant.

They both do equal share when doing the laundry or cleaning around certain areas of the house. Overall, I agree with the statement that sharing tasks is largely symbolic. It shows that the chores are not just for one person and shows your willingness to help your partner.